Thursday, January 28, 2010

Helpful hints

I wish I could hold seminars for lesbians trying to conceive. Now I am not claiming to be some sort of fertility expert, and I know that we are lucky to have gotten pregnant so fast, but reading some lesbians journeys trying to conceive just makes me so frustrated.

Before we started, Ros bought me The Essential Guide to Lesbian Conception, Pregnancy, and Birth for Christmas. We read that book cover to cover (minus a few chapters that didn't pertain to me at all). I made it my mission to become the most fertile dyke I could be, mainly because I wanted to limit Ros's exposure to semen. I mean we're lesbians, and one of the biggest perks of being so is not having to be around that sticky, smelly stuff. Also, I didn't want to burn through our entire life savings on buying stuff that men just waste on a daily basis.

Months before even thinking of trying, I was vigilant on temping every morning. I started a regimen of herbal supplements and vitamins that I thought would help my cycle and my body. I drank organic fertility tea daily that I made from scratch even when we went on vacation. I exercised and tried eating organically (most of the time). I even tried to do a body cleanse which sent me running for toilets in various places due to the "colon cleansing aspect". Ros became intimately familiar with my cervix and what it's texture and position meant for my impending ovulation. It wasn't easy and sometimes not very pleasant. It really isn't my personality to live this kind of lifestyle, but I knew what I wanted, what we wanted, and wanted to make it as easy as possible to get there. I also read the book Making Babies, which takes eastern and western philosophies on fertility and incorporated some of those into my life, like eating "warm" foods to help become pregnant. I felt like it was my job to groom the fertile environment within me. I read this was important in some hippie type book I stumbled across and thought that nothing could be truer. You wouldn't throw seeds in some chemical filled nasty dirt and expect them to sprout into beautiful flowers.

I really just feel bad for some of the posts I read on babycenter. I just read over and over again women who are failing mainly because they just don't know their cycle and their body. They use ovulation predictors but don't really know what those predictors mean for them. They are unaware of the time their mucus is most fertile, before or after ovulation. I found that to be one of the helpful signs. The list goes on.

My advice for everyone trying to conceive is to make your body into a science experiment. Try and gather as much information as you possibly can about your fertility signs and your cycle. Write it down each month. Temp and use OPK's to see how long after your OPK turns positive that you actually ovulate. Eat well and exercise. Drink fertility tea. And when all else fails get a St. Gerard medal (the patron saint of motherhood) and wear it daily. Although I am a "recovering" catholic and really not religious at all, Sue at Ros's work got us each a medal because she swears by the power of it. Well we started wearing it and we got pregnant that month. Call it coincidence, but we didn't take that medal off until my first trimester passed. Here we are almost 18 weeks along and all is well.

Monday, January 18, 2010

Last "unofficial" ultrasound... I mean it!!!

Woohoo, girlie parts. I am excited to be having a little girl, although for some reason I feel as though I would be more equipped to handle a boy, why, I'm really not sure. Maybe it's because in my non-maternity state I like wearing boy clothes so I enjoy little boy outfits a bit more than the frills and lace of the girlier variety? I'm really not sure. At least now one question doesn't have to be answered, to circumcise or not to circumcise... How the heck could I decide, I don't have a penis...

So thus comes the end of our unofficial ultrasounds, this brings our total ultrasoundage to 6. It was just so tempting to be able to take a peak at her every few weeks while bored at work waiting for my shift to end. Unfortunately with the joy also comes my neurosis (due to incessant Internet searches) that I did something wrong by ultrasounding too much. Really are ultrasounds safe??? I guess they are pretty safe, but not 100%. I just hope we didn't give her some sort of brain damage from all those sound waves bouncing off her developing little brain and ears. I know I'm being paranoid and neurotic, but I can't help myself. I think I'm just preparing myself for a lifetime of neurotic thoughts, are vaccinations safe? Is that the right school to send her to? Should I bubble wrap her before she leaves the house? It's overwhelming now to think that the choices I make now while she is still growing inside me could possibly affect her for the rest of her life...

What's done is done, and I'm going to try not to stress to much about what I can't change. I can now be excited about pink outfits, ponytails, princess outfits, and dolls galore... Or maybe she'll turn out to be my little tomboy clone who wants to play in the mud in her overalls and wouldn't even think of putting on a dress??? I guess only time will tell us what her personality is all about, for now all I hope is that she is healthy and the cutest little peanut around.

Sunday, January 17, 2010

It's a vagina!

Well, it was 3 lines that we were told is a vagina, but I believe what we were told. Nickie gave in to have one more "unofficial" ultrasound while she was at work. I got the call from her at 11:40pm while she was at work and I think I was at Newton-Wellesley by midnight. I didn't even change out of my pajamas! We saw the 3 lines in Nugget's crotch and the void area between her li'l legs.

It was making me crazy not knowing. I hate not knowing things. I was that kid that found my presents in my parents' closet weeks before Christmas (sorry, mom). I think I'm a tough person to surprise, because I'll start digging for clues if there is the slightest inkling that there's something going on. I'll chalk it up to the impulsiveness and greediness of being a Taurus.
As far as the actual gender was concerned, I was pretty indifferent. Working in acute pediatrics gives me an appreciation for kids that can breathe on their own and don't need assistive devices to function. I don't care what's between their legs. Nickie had said she preferred a boy in the past, but since she's been saying its a girl since day one, I think she's pretty comfortable with the idea. But, I'll let her blog about that at another time.

I like that I can picture what our future will look like a bit more vividly. I can see our tea parties and playing dress up. (I can't believe that's going to be our life!) I picked up a few girly things that I can picture on her. If she's anything like her mom, she'll need bows... lots of bows.

Side note: 16 week ultrasounds are a bit scary; there's bone being made and the soft tissue comes later. She kind of looked like Skeletor. Scary!

Friday, January 15, 2010

Next obsession...

So my need for citrus has passed. My new craving is now for anything frozen in the fruit form. My 2 new favorites are Trader Joe's Fruit Flo's and Smooze. They say you crave things that your body needs, I guess I'm in need of sugary fruity ice.


Wednesday, January 13, 2010

A New Year's miracle

I am excited to report that I have found some not-so-girly maternity shirts. Hooray, I thought this feat would be impossible, now I can relax that I won't have to be seen in half buttoned button downs and my belly hanging out of my t-shirts. Right now I can still get away with wearing some of my old shirts but forget about any of my pants, well except for my sweat pants of course and since I can't live in those. While in Destination Maternity today I had to put on one of these pregnant belly thingies (a 7-month one) to try on my clothes. What a mind f*ck. It's bizarre because I know I'm pregnant, we've heard the heartbeat, seen the baby, but somehow it's hard to believe that I'm going to look like all of those other pregnant ladies out there. Today I saw myself as one of them, and boy was it friggen hilarious.

One of the best parts about being a nurse is the fact that I don't have to buy any new work clothes. Those nice maternity clothes cost a small fortune and I'm glad we can spend our money on better things. Unfortunately I had to move up a size in scrub tops to a medium to accommodate my ever growing belly, hips, and butt. But since I get my new bigger scrubs free at work, it's a little less painful.

So here we are, 15 weeks and change, and I'm feeling pretty good. My energy level has definitly improved, it's nice not to feel like a slug all the time. The worst thing now is my heartburn, which is nothing new. Although now it has started actually burning, whereas before it was only constant vurping. Tums are my best friend. I have also had backaches with sciatica pain, usually after bending down for any (even slightly extended) period of time. And headaches have become a minor issue, especially when I'm working. I think the fluroesent lighting is definitly a contributing factor to that problem. I know that 800mg of motrin would do the trick for my head and back, too bad the only thing safe to take is tylenol, which is like spitting on a campfire to put it out.

Thursday, January 7, 2010


I just figured out there's only 180 days to go! I don't know if I want to cheer, cry or puke! OMG! (Will I still be able to use trendy abbreviations when I'm a mom?) That's really all I have for right now, but I think that's enough! =)

Sunday, January 3, 2010

Style or function???

So what is more important when choosing baby items??? Now that we are 14 weeks along, I can now stop being so superstitious and start looking at baby things that we are actually going to buy...

The big dilemma of the day is what is more important, style or function, when it comes to car seats??? There is one that we really like by Graco which holds baby up to 32 lbs and has a really cute design on it. We both really like it, problem is, I'm not sure why Graco doesn't make any car seats with a vertical handle bar. It is not ergonomically correct to have to hold your hand horizontal to your body when holding a heavy seat with a heavy baby in it. I can totally feel the carpal tunnel coming on already. On the other hand, Baby Trend makes a car seat with a great, very comfortable and erogonomically correct handle, but their seats are ugly has hell. Also their seats only hold babies up to 22 lbs, personally I don't want to have to buy 3 car seats for this kid.


Although these aren't the exact seats we were looking at, you get the idea of the different handles. Decisions, decisions...